Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Crazy Helicopter Mom!!

So I have been called a Crazy helicopter Mom on more than one occasion and I have a feeling today may be one of those days... But honestly I DON'T CARE!!!

One thing that should never be tolerated is bullying in any form! And it especially should not be tolerated in a school district... What am I talking about you ask... One hint!!!

Yes the big yellow twinkie, the cheese box, what ever you call it its something most kids ride and honestly it should be a place of safety not bullying!!!

Monday my son got of the bus saying his best buddy (who is smaller than the rest and kinda quiet) was punched and made fun of... Yes I was upset but knowing the two kids involved I knew there must be a bit more behind it. What really upset me though was the bus driver let it happen!! So I was stewing a bit and spoke with his buddy's mom...

The next day my son's teacher emailed me to let me know that there was an incident on the playground where my son was punched. It turns out some of the problem children on the bus were making fun of my daughter for the way she talks and my son was defending his little sister. He never laid a finger on them but ended up at the nurses station because he was repeatedly punched by these kids.

If you have been following my blog (or know me) you would know that my daughter was born two months early with failure to thrive and we were told if she would live past three months she would be brain dead for the rest of her life. Well fast forward six years and I have a beautiful, smart. athletic, Daisy Scout Cheerleader who is a bit shy because of her speech issues. She did not start talking until she was almost 4. She has caught up a lot and has a bigger vocabulary than most kids her age but she is shy to use it because a lot of people do not understand her (even teachers). So yes my son is very VERY protective of his baby sister!! BUT not only that... THEY GO TO DIFFERENT SCHOOLS!!!

In our town we have three k-2 schools and then one 3-5 and one middle and one high school. They do this because we have a small (to most standards) town and they like the kids to have a small school feel so they get more individual attention. Even in the 3-5 school they have three wings. Two wings are for 3&4th grade and the third wing is for 5th. Each wing is like it's own little school and you stay within your wing unless you have an out class (art, music, library, computer, or gym) and the out classes are in their own wing.

So basically these 3rd grade kids in my son's wing (who live on our street) were making fun of my daughter in 1st grade in another school.  So when I got an email about this from his teacher he informed me this was the second time this year (we have had like 8 school days at most!) my son was in the nurses office and the first time was the day before because on the way to school a child had pinched him repeatedly. This was the same boy who had punched my son's friend and is a year older than the boys. This was the first I had heard about the incident and was eager to find out more!!

Yesterday also happened to be open house so I was able to meet with his teacher and speak to him about it face to face. It turns out that they are looking into it at school and trying to pin point the children involved.

So this morning my kids did not want to take the bus. It was so bad my daughter was so stressed her stomach ached! I understood my son but was confused by my daughter! I had asked her what was wrong and she would not tell me...

She normally sits with the same boy (my son's buddy's little brother... they grew up playing together because of their brothers) but the little boy is in Kindergarten and the bus driver makes the kindergarteners sit in the front on the way to school (but not on the way back). She never has anyone to sit with on the way to school because of this and it depresses her!! She is new to the school (we lived in TX last year just for a year and she went to Kindergarten there and then we moved back to the same street that we lived in before when we moved back) and the kids are not used to her speech so she has been having trouble making friends.

She knew she couldn't sit with him on the way to school so she sat behind him and then it happened...

The bus driver YELLED at my baby girl!! That is a no go for me! He YELLED at her and told her to move to the back of the bus!! I went to the grocery store after getting her on the bus (same bus, same bus driver, different times) and was next to the bus at the red light (only one between the house and school) and it happened I was right next to her window...

All I saw was a full head of blonde curls with her head down and the saddest look on her face! I mean really!! It broke my heart! So between the kids being bullied on the Intermediate School bus and now my daughter crying because the bus driver yelled at her I had had it! So I did what any helicopter mom would o in this situation...

I called the bus department to complain!! I was AMAZED! I was the first person to complain to them about this route! She was in shock and upset and promised to look into it so we will see what happens...

My husband wants me to drive the kids and pick them up everyday but honestly I have issues with that:

  1. The bullies win and are left to bully the other kids (including my son's buddy)
  2. That takes time and money from my day (extra gas and with the prices the way they are its a lot right now!! but that is the least of the reasons)
  3. The kids need to learn how to handle situations like this.
Not everyone will get a long all the time and I feel the kids need to learn how to handle these situations. I feel in this situation it is the bus driver's fault for letting this take place!!

Bullying is big in the news (FINALLY) and people are speaking out! I feel as a school employee (which bus drivers are) they are responsible for keeping the kids safe. Not only safe on the road but safe from being hit, made fun of, or alienated!!!

So what are your opinions and what would you have done...

I would love a nice conversation on here but please...

No bullying!


  1. Please do not let this go. Do not think the bus people and the school will take care of this. You need to stay on top of them. Including forcing the school to hold a conference with all the parents and kids involved. You NEED to be able to know who these kids are where they live and what they look like. Sometimes parents think that it is taken care of through the school but actually its not. The bullied children just stop telling them. Please talk to your neighbors and other parents you may know who's children go on the same bus or the same school. If other kids on the bus have been made aware (mom and dad telling them YOU stand up to a bully if you see someone being bullied by saying stop and getting an adult) most likely they will give help when its needed.
    We live in Central Maine and if your kid gets caught fighting on the bus and gets booted for a day or two all the parent has to do is whine and the mean kids get back on. EVERYTIME.
    Also I would NEVER let my daughter get back on that bus again. I would insist that they either replace the driver, send another bus or I would drive her myself. Most likely I would drive her myself hang the time and expense.

  2. Just want to say this does not make you a "helicopter mom". That term, I believe, applies more in situations where a parent overprotects their children. Here you are merely protecting them. Sad that this happened and you did what I think any rational parent would do. And good for you for letting the kids learn from it!

  3. I will say from past experiences the school will not call it bullying unless it has happened repeatedly -so anytime it happens you need to document it and have the school document it. That way when it doesnt stop you can show the documented cases to the school and demand they step up to stop the bullying!